I can only imagine what being a Ghanaian woman is like… because it’s hard enough being a white woman in Ghana…
As I was trying (trying being the operative word here), to fetch water (as it seems that most of the water ends up on me rather than staying in the bucket), I was called over to hold a new baby. (I think that the villagers think I’m a good luck charm… as they hand me children to hold they always say “you will take it with you to America and make it very rich”). After a few minutes of me holding the baby, the father (or I’m assuming he was as he was the one who handed me the baby) of the child looks at me and then says, “We should start, right now.” I looked at him in total confusion… “Start what?” I said. “Having babies,” he responded calmly.
I about blew up… I quickly handed the baby back, and looked at them man (who I’m sure I’ve met before but I couldn’t tell you his name) and told him I wasn’t in Africa to have children, his or anyone else’s and walked off.
From my personal observations it seems to me that the women do practically everything in Ghana… from raising the children, to cooking the food, washing the clothing, tending to the farm, and working whatever odd jobs that they may do (running a little store, selling veggies at the market, being a tailor, or a hairdresser, selling prepared food on the road side). The men have little to do with the children. They may hold the baby from time to time and scold it if it doesn’t bring it something but primarily the child rearing is up the mother.
I was talking to a seamstress friend they other day, and she was telling me that she will be getting a new intern working for her to learn how to sew, but she turned to look at me and said “but now I must find her a place to live near my shop, because her husband wants her to only go to and from work and not associate with other people. Her husband is afraid that another man will try to take her away from him.”
The men are in complete control of everything… EVERYTHING!
Out of the two schools that I teach at there is only ONE-woman teacher. I’m so proud of her… but when I go to the school, she is still serving the men their food, and catering to their needs. But she asked me the other day how to find a ‘white husband’… And as I started to inquire about her life I found out that she is married to a police officer in Hohoe, and she has a son who is about 1 years old… but she is trying to divorce her husband (yes divorce is still possible in this male dominating country) because he physically abuses her. She then continued to tell me how she went to tell her husband’s boss and report the abuse. The chief of police looked at her and said that he wouldn't write a report because it would look bad on the husbands’ behalf. So she will just have to deal with it.
Deal with it… most women here just have to deal with it… deal with the abuse, being a baby machine, being totally submissive to the husband, dealing with the lack of respect.
This is a male dominating country and women are still required to do what their husbands say.
It’s not to say that women aren’t making headway… In Accra and other larger cities the women are starting to get more office positions and women are starting to attend college. I occasionally see women behind the wheel of a car… but from where I stand in my little rural village it is every so much a male dominated world.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Questions that I’m commonly asked or have been asked in Ghana
Q: So I was told that when taking a plane one must take some special medicine so they don’t have to go to the bathroom while traveling… is that true?” (well it would have been great to do along with this idea… but I decided to tell the truth, there are lavatories on planes where one can ease him or herself)
Q: “How does one pound his/(her) Fufu in America… with a machine?” (haha… we don’t even eat Fufu in America)
Q: “Is it allowed for a man to have more than one wife in America?” (only if you’re Mormon)
Q: “What is the age that it is looked down upon when one is not married by?” (Good Question, hope it’s not 24.)
Q: “Is it true that America is completely flat?” (haha, haha, I’m still laughing)
Q: “When the chief dies in your village in America where do they bury him? Is there a special place for all the chiefs?” (Oh Boy…)
Q: “Do you know how to drive a car… can you drive a vehicle?” (It never really occurred to me that I hardly EVER see a woman driving in Ghana. And unlike most western countries people in Ghana learn to drive as a profession rather than as a source of independence.)
Q: “Do you know how to weed… do you weed with a cutlass in America?” (A cutlass is the main farming tool in Ghana… for weeding, digging up soil, getting fruit from the tree, you name it, you probably will use a cutlass for it.)
Q: So I was told that when taking a plane one must take some special medicine so they don’t have to go to the bathroom while traveling… is that true?” (well it would have been great to do along with this idea… but I decided to tell the truth, there are lavatories on planes where one can ease him or herself)
Q: “How does one pound his/(her) Fufu in America… with a machine?” (haha… we don’t even eat Fufu in America)
Q: “Is it allowed for a man to have more than one wife in America?” (only if you’re Mormon)
Q: “What is the age that it is looked down upon when one is not married by?” (Good Question, hope it’s not 24.)
Q: “Is it true that America is completely flat?” (haha, haha, I’m still laughing)
Q: “When the chief dies in your village in America where do they bury him? Is there a special place for all the chiefs?” (Oh Boy…)
Q: “Do you know how to drive a car… can you drive a vehicle?” (It never really occurred to me that I hardly EVER see a woman driving in Ghana. And unlike most western countries people in Ghana learn to drive as a profession rather than as a source of independence.)
Q: “Do you know how to weed… do you weed with a cutlass in America?” (A cutlass is the main farming tool in Ghana… for weeding, digging up soil, getting fruit from the tree, you name it, you probably will use a cutlass for it.)
Friday, December 17, 2010
Everyday I’m asked 1,001 questions… or so it seems. Generally once a question is asked it opens the floodgates to the rest. So today when my land lady asked me if the change of seasons was the same in America as it was in Ghana I had to shake my head and say no… that rather as Ghana is heating up, most of the US is cooling off (not really including Florida, Hawaii, Arizona and SoCal in the mix of things). I tried to explain that there is snow on the ground and everyone is bunkering down for winter… I don’t think they fully grasped they idea.
But with a card I received in one of my packages (thanks Scott Doherty) I was able to show what Glenwood Springs looks like with a clean, white blanket of snow. The crowed quickly gathered around in amazement… “ahhh snoooooo, that is snooooooo on the ground.” (coming from a crowd of people who only know heat) As the card got passed around the 10 or so Ghanaians that were gathered the first question was asked…
“So Sister Abra, how do people stay warm then with the snow? I mean what do the poor people do when it gets cold?”
(Hummmmm… welll) I had to think about this for a minute, but these are questions that never really have crossed my mind (luckily I’ve always had a roof over my head a warm place to sleep)… almost all houses have either a central heating system, and or a fire place (gas, electric, or wood burning). Now I could very well be wrong here, but it’s almost one of the building codes, just as houses have to have stairs built by certain measurement, houses must have a way to heat its self. And that’s not to disregard the fact that houses are built with insulation too. Then to talk about the poor… if one is homeless then there are many shelters that open their doors to the poor during the winter providing food and a warm place to sleep… I knew I was in over my head trying to explain this to a group of undereducated Ghanaians… “a house for people to sleep that don’t have money?” but it was fun trying. Then the next question arose…
“Ok so then during the winter what do people do? It must be so cold that you can NEVER leave your house. Do you stay inside for the whole winter?
(These questions always make me laugh) At this point in the conversation I threw out my Ghanaian English and said, “I am coming” (meaning I’ll be right back) and went to grab my computer. (I was reluctant to bring my computer out, but I realized that pictures are the best way to describe skiing!) So with my computer in hand I started to show the crowd pictures of snow falling form the sky and skiing and some of the various winter activities that I have photographically documented. Trying to help these Ghanaians grasp that winter is my favorite time of year. Then one of the onlookers looks at me and asks…
“So then Sister Abra, how do the trees cope with the cold?
(I was about to roll over laughing at this point… found a true tree hugger in the group) Well I then tried to explain that where I live we have a different variety of trees… there aren’t coconut, palm nut, orange, mango, baobab, moringa, papaya, avocado, teek, coco, and many other varieties that they grow here in Ghana. We have needle trees, and deciduous trees, and that during the winter Mother Nature puts her plants to sleep. They found this fascinating. I found it fascinating trying to explain this to them.
As I was about to end the picture show the crowd asked to see one more… saying…
“Sister Abra, you were supposed to show your parents first… so please show us a photo of you parents.”
(Sorry mom and dad, love you and all, but you weren’t the first thing to cross my mind when showing a group of Ghanaians pictures of America) The first picture I found was a family shot taken at my cousin’s wedding last October (when I had short, short hair). The whole crowd (maybe 15 at this point) all gushed “oh Sister Abra your mother and father and your sisters, an American Family!” Then another on looker said “In Ghana when a man is bald that means he is a rich man.” (Props to you dad, and your baldhead!)
But with a card I received in one of my packages (thanks Scott Doherty) I was able to show what Glenwood Springs looks like with a clean, white blanket of snow. The crowed quickly gathered around in amazement… “ahhh snoooooo, that is snooooooo on the ground.” (coming from a crowd of people who only know heat) As the card got passed around the 10 or so Ghanaians that were gathered the first question was asked…
“So Sister Abra, how do people stay warm then with the snow? I mean what do the poor people do when it gets cold?”
(Hummmmm… welll) I had to think about this for a minute, but these are questions that never really have crossed my mind (luckily I’ve always had a roof over my head a warm place to sleep)… almost all houses have either a central heating system, and or a fire place (gas, electric, or wood burning). Now I could very well be wrong here, but it’s almost one of the building codes, just as houses have to have stairs built by certain measurement, houses must have a way to heat its self. And that’s not to disregard the fact that houses are built with insulation too. Then to talk about the poor… if one is homeless then there are many shelters that open their doors to the poor during the winter providing food and a warm place to sleep… I knew I was in over my head trying to explain this to a group of undereducated Ghanaians… “a house for people to sleep that don’t have money?” but it was fun trying. Then the next question arose…
“Ok so then during the winter what do people do? It must be so cold that you can NEVER leave your house. Do you stay inside for the whole winter?
(These questions always make me laugh) At this point in the conversation I threw out my Ghanaian English and said, “I am coming” (meaning I’ll be right back) and went to grab my computer. (I was reluctant to bring my computer out, but I realized that pictures are the best way to describe skiing!) So with my computer in hand I started to show the crowd pictures of snow falling form the sky and skiing and some of the various winter activities that I have photographically documented. Trying to help these Ghanaians grasp that winter is my favorite time of year. Then one of the onlookers looks at me and asks…
“So then Sister Abra, how do the trees cope with the cold?
(I was about to roll over laughing at this point… found a true tree hugger in the group) Well I then tried to explain that where I live we have a different variety of trees… there aren’t coconut, palm nut, orange, mango, baobab, moringa, papaya, avocado, teek, coco, and many other varieties that they grow here in Ghana. We have needle trees, and deciduous trees, and that during the winter Mother Nature puts her plants to sleep. They found this fascinating. I found it fascinating trying to explain this to them.
As I was about to end the picture show the crowd asked to see one more… saying…
“Sister Abra, you were supposed to show your parents first… so please show us a photo of you parents.”
(Sorry mom and dad, love you and all, but you weren’t the first thing to cross my mind when showing a group of Ghanaians pictures of America) The first picture I found was a family shot taken at my cousin’s wedding last October (when I had short, short hair). The whole crowd (maybe 15 at this point) all gushed “oh Sister Abra your mother and father and your sisters, an American Family!” Then another on looker said “In Ghana when a man is bald that means he is a rich man.” (Props to you dad, and your baldhead!)
For the first time in my life I found that I was praying that there was a ‘porcelain god’ rather than praying to the ‘porcelain god.’ It’s been a rough week and latrines just sucks in a time like this… that’s all I’m going to say about that.
Life in Ghana continues… the seasons are finally changing. And everyone is saying “it will be just like America”… (sure… with plentiful amounts of snow, temperatures below freezing and big mountains that I can ski… sure Ghana is just like America) Rather Ghana is coming upon the ‘hot/dry season’ upon hamatan (so maybe like Western Colorado and Utah in the summer). The winds from the Sahara Desert are starting to blow the sand down south; the lush green jungle area that I once inhabited is now turning brown and dry. The dust from the roads is out of control. And the ‘amazing’ drivers throughout Ghana don’t understand the ‘drive slowly through residential areas when on a dirt road’ rule. Rather its see a village and let’s see how fast one can go… pleasant to breath in.
Time is, I would have to say going by rather fast (as in it’s almost the end of 2010). I have past my 6th month marker of being ‘in country’ and now I’m approaching the 4th month marker of being ‘at site.’ (6 down and still a long way to go…oh boy)
I’m still a topic of great discussion through out my village… “What is Sister Abra doing?” “Where is Sister Abra going?” “How is Sister Abra doing it?” Whatever I happen to be doing… carrying water, washing my clothing, weeding my garden, preparing dinner, bathing (yes people still like to watch me bath even though they can only see from my shoulders up), walking, reading, running or riding my bicycle. I am quite the spectacle (Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to the Molly Rumery exhibit… come and watch her live.)
And the living continues!
Life in Ghana continues… the seasons are finally changing. And everyone is saying “it will be just like America”… (sure… with plentiful amounts of snow, temperatures below freezing and big mountains that I can ski… sure Ghana is just like America) Rather Ghana is coming upon the ‘hot/dry season’ upon hamatan (so maybe like Western Colorado and Utah in the summer). The winds from the Sahara Desert are starting to blow the sand down south; the lush green jungle area that I once inhabited is now turning brown and dry. The dust from the roads is out of control. And the ‘amazing’ drivers throughout Ghana don’t understand the ‘drive slowly through residential areas when on a dirt road’ rule. Rather its see a village and let’s see how fast one can go… pleasant to breath in.
Time is, I would have to say going by rather fast (as in it’s almost the end of 2010). I have past my 6th month marker of being ‘in country’ and now I’m approaching the 4th month marker of being ‘at site.’ (6 down and still a long way to go…oh boy)
I’m still a topic of great discussion through out my village… “What is Sister Abra doing?” “Where is Sister Abra going?” “How is Sister Abra doing it?” Whatever I happen to be doing… carrying water, washing my clothing, weeding my garden, preparing dinner, bathing (yes people still like to watch me bath even though they can only see from my shoulders up), walking, reading, running or riding my bicycle. I am quite the spectacle (Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to the Molly Rumery exhibit… come and watch her live.)
And the living continues!
Things I found while clearing out my garden…
1.Sandals (in all different shapes and sizes)
2.Clothing (shirts, pants, skirts, dresses, undergarments, you name it I found it)
3.String
4.Belts
5.Cans
6.Packaging of the Sorts
7.Plastic Bags
8.Teeth (yes I found a row of someone’s teeth, and I’m waiting in anticipation to find the body someday while I’m working)
9.Old cutlasses
10.Rubber boots
11.Old Cartons of Cigarettes
12.Nails
13.Glass (bottles, jars, mirrors)
14.Lids (for everything)
15.CD Cases (no CD though)
16.Rims for Tires
17.Old Tires
18.Glasses (someone probably can’t see to well now)
19.Hair Attachments (to many in fact)
20.Old Roles of Film (the negatives)
I’m guessing that my garden was a previous spot for someone to dump his or her trash… (oh wait most of Ghana is a place where people dump their trash… keeping their country clean isn’t too high in their priorities.)
1.Sandals (in all different shapes and sizes)
2.Clothing (shirts, pants, skirts, dresses, undergarments, you name it I found it)
3.String
4.Belts
5.Cans
6.Packaging of the Sorts
7.Plastic Bags
8.Teeth (yes I found a row of someone’s teeth, and I’m waiting in anticipation to find the body someday while I’m working)
9.Old cutlasses
10.Rubber boots
11.Old Cartons of Cigarettes
12.Nails
13.Glass (bottles, jars, mirrors)
14.Lids (for everything)
15.CD Cases (no CD though)
16.Rims for Tires
17.Old Tires
18.Glasses (someone probably can’t see to well now)
19.Hair Attachments (to many in fact)
20.Old Roles of Film (the negatives)
I’m guessing that my garden was a previous spot for someone to dump his or her trash… (oh wait most of Ghana is a place where people dump their trash… keeping their country clean isn’t too high in their priorities.)
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